Si Dios Quiere

Well I’m home now. It’s been a crazy whirlwind. I didn’t have much time to blog those last few weeks in the DR. We had back to back groups and then it was time to travel back to the land of ‘Merica, find a place to live, and move there. So here’s what you missed…..

I milked a cow. It was pretty epic. It had been on my bucket-list for a while, so I was glad to actually do it. What I didn’t realize, however, was that it was cause me to have extra anxiety when trying to re-enter the USA when my form got denied due to “being in close proximity with livestock.” Thanks be to God, I made it home anyway (after talking with an officer) and have a great milking memory to look back on!

I also had some time after church one day to go to the beach with a group. Silvia (my 12 yr old manita who is like a little sister to me) came along too and seemed to have the best day of her life. We built cheerleader pyramids in the ocean, I took her out on a sailboat, played a racing game on the beach, and I gave her a swimming lesson after realizing she didn’t know how to swim. It was great….which explains my confusion when I found out that night that she attempted to end her life by jumping off a three story building. Thanks be to God, she didn’t actually jump, but she definitely needs a lot of prayer. My heart has been all over the place because of that girl. I bonded with her so well and truly care for her as a little sister. She has a hard life for sure….HIV, an older sister who verbally abuses her, and her parents both died before she was a day old. I’m so glad she has Makarios and the church to care for her and make sure her needs get met. Please pray that she learns the true love of God and is able to be connected with a good counselor.

Silvia :)

                Kelly and I had the unique and special opportunity of cooking dinner for Lucia (our housekeeper) and her family of six. We made fish (her favorite) with rice, zucchini, and pineapple/mango smoothies. It was a memory I will cherish dearly. Even with the communication barrier, we had great and hilarious dinner conversation in Spanish. And when Lucia’s husband prays (who is a pastor in the neighboring community of Los Algodones), I feel revived. I’m also really interested by family dynamics, and being in the DR I am even more so because of the compounded cultural differences. Lucia’s family is one of my favorites I have ever encountered. They are a beautiful, hilarious, God-seeking unit – all unique yet complimenting each other in a way that can only be explained by divine intervention. We ate the meal on the roof to get the sunset view, and by the time we were done eating, the sky was lit by the stars.

Lucia :)

                Speaking of stars, I finally got a chance to work on my solar power investigation for Makarios. I collected information and devised plans for solar power at the Mak house as well as the school. Based on solar data of the region, projected project costs, and energy usage by Makarios, I found that using solar panels should be very beneficial long term, especially if the panels could be donated or provided by a grant. I collected contact information of local suppliers that sell and install solar systems. And I took a look at the school and talked with Benjamin about what plans should work. For the school, it would be wise to wait a couple more years until the new addition is built on to include the solar panels. The new part of the building will be an extra story high, which will make the shade of the trees not an issue. Hopefully the Makarios staff follow up about this and use the information I compiled for them because it could be very helpful in the future to not only offset electrical cost but also to help keep the batteries charged so there is less time without power.

A couple times during the summer, Doug and Margaret usually get away for a few days to have time alone and recharge. The first time they went away, they missed us interns the whole time. So, on their second get-away, they invited us to join them in Cabarete for a couple days! We got to go to the beach and stay in air conditioning (I had forgotten what that was like). It was a great time of fellowship and rejuvenation before the final two weeks of the summer – which really flew by with record-sized groups back to back then we flew home. During the trip, we got to go snorkeling with Benjamin and Vierka (his wife), which was such a special treat. We got on a boat far from civilization. The nearest restroom in ten miles was a local woman’s outhouse...or the ocean. It was beautiful. And we got to eat fresh coconut. Be jealous. Also, it was great quality time with Benjamin and Vierka, who are dear friends of mine now. They just got married a year ago and are a great example of a godly marriage.

Snorkeling crew

Ladies out breakfast with Margaret and Kelly before chaos ensued.

That same day, three of my friends had babies. Weird, right? It seems I’m at that stage in life where my friends are having babies and getting married and such. I’m traveling the world. Well, now I’m back, but my adventure never ends. I just got a dog. He’s the sweetest, constantly stealing my heart. His name is Rocko. You should come visit me and meet him.

Benjamin and Vierka and I got to go on another adventure the next day: a four hour trip down to the Dominican capitol city: Santo Domingo. But it wasn’t just a for-fun trip (though it was definitely fun). I’d been looking forward to that day for several months. It was the day I got to meet my Compassion child Angelica. I could write an entire blog about that one day. It was full of anticipation, emotion, fear, laughter, chicken, and love. Angelica is five years old. She just started school. She lives with her parents and little brother. She is super shy when you first meet her – to the point that I wasn’t sure she had the ability to speak. But she is so much fun when she opens up. And she’s adorable too. I’m so glad I got to meet her and that I have the privilege of partnering with Compassion to make her life better and provide godly influences in her life. I look forward to seeing what God does in her life over the years, as she will be in the program until she’s 19. It was super encouraging to meet her Compassion supervisor too, who was also a Compassion child when she was younger. And so was Benjamin, which made the trip extra special. It was sad to leave. Angelica ran inside without hugging me and wouldn’t say a word because she was so upset that we were leaving. Her mom brought her back out and I got a hug before we left. Bittersweet. But definitely sweet to look back on. Priceless.

With Angelica and her family in their house in Santo Domingo

            The next week, Kelly kept me sane as we shared our room with three other women and shared our bathroom with 12 people total. Thanks to the Lord, it went as smoothly as it could have possibly gone, with a sick child and all. And Kelly brilliantly put a homemade poster on the bathroom wall that said, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourself.” Whenever I would see that, I would check myself. There is definitely power in Scripture, and that verse helped me a lot that week to maintain a servant focus.

                I also got to drive Margaret’s car briefly! AKA I drove a car on the crazy streets of the DR! CHECK ME OUT, YO!!! Margaret had to walk to the store from a restaurant because we were in a hurry to get Kelly home because she was feeling horribly. So Margaret left, and I stayed to pay the tab then drove to pick Margaret up after she checked out. I felt accomplished, so I wanted to let you know hehe.

                The final week of my time in the DR was definitely my favorite. I saw God at work the most. It was also the craziest, busiest, and most stressful week of all. But it was full of love. On the first night, the team got several hours late (around 3AM) due to flight delays. The second night, Nicole, a 16yr old girl on one of the teams got her appendix out (nbd) and was in the hospital for four days, which means that Margaret was also MIA for four days, which means that the rest of us were scrambling to fill her shoes (not to mention Jacob’s shoes too because he went back to Texas early for a wedding). Did I mention it was one of the biggest groups of the summer? Then Nelda and Mike, a sweet older couple, found out midweek that their son back in the states was having liver issues. He had had a stroke at the beginning of the trip. The liver issues ended up being severe, so they flew home a day early. But guess what also happened in the midst of the chaos?? LOVE. Miguel (one of our watchees) accepted Christ!!!!!!!!! Women who didn’t even know Nicole gave up their time and sleep to care for her in the hospital. There was LOTS of praying going on. And all of us interns were working like crazy – yet enjoying it abundantly….practicing the presence of God. Even just remembering that week as I type makes me feel such purpose and peace and love. MMMMMMM yes good stuff. One thing that Margaret said that week that really stuck with me is “people over project.” As in, we need to prioritize people over our tasks. As an instinctual Martha (vs. Mary), that really hit home with me. I want to make my life more that way, focusing on relationships and encouraging others rather than simply getting my to-do list met. To-do lists are great, and getting stuff done is great, but I need to remember to prioritize the eternal beings around me. People over project.

Final community visit of the summer. I miss holding those sweet hands.

                Leaving was great but awful. It hurts me to write about it. There were so many tears. We caused a scene at the airport with several people crying, praying, waving, hugging, taking pictures, and saying final goodbyes. The morning before we left, Lucia and Abram and Belizeur (her sons) came over for breakfast and gave us parting gifts. Lucia made homemade purses for Kelly and me. Mine is purple because she knew that is my favorite color. She is a busy woman with four kids and works full time cooking and cleaning at the Mak house. I don’t know how she had time to make those. But that made it even more special. Hugging Silvia and praying over her with the other interns was super special as well. Though I wanted to take her with me in my luggage, it wasn’t possible. So I just have to trust that God will take care of her.

The airport goodbye crowd

Being back and processing has been great. It wasn’t as hard of a transition back as I thought it might be. But I’m definitely forever changed. I’m determined to become fluent in Spanish. I hope to reenter the international mission field (si Dios quiere – if God desires) in the future. I am grateful for AC but still feel at peace sweating in 100 degrees. I was also blessed to process a lot of the trip with my friend Callie from Cedarville. She had spent fall semester in the DR so we could relate to each other a lot, even though she had stayed in a different part of the country. From processing with her about the cultural differences, trying to take the good from the Dominican and American cultures and apply them to our lives, we realize we need to have a balance. We need to be relational and hospitable, focusing on others; but we also need to get stuff done to fulfill God’s purpose in our lives. Ultimately, in the day-by-day, we need to look to the Lord for guidance in decisions and interactions with others and remember to be fueled by His love in everything.

Now for my next adventure: life in Columbus, IN. That's me in the driver seat of a moving truck, next to dad.

                Since I’ve been back, I have been blessed by my support here. Coming back and staying with my Dad and Rhonda for a week was such shalom. I also purged my belongings in a yard sale to support my sister Laurel’s trip to Belgium! (She’s studying abroad there right now.) I also found an apartment here in Columbus, IN and moved in. It was a blessing that really just fell into my lap. Long story, but it’s a brand new and affordable apartment with great neighbors and a great landlord, and it wasn’t ever posted online. I also went to my friend Sarah’s wedding. And I found a church here that I think I want to stick with and help with the youth. And I’m scheduled for four Zumba classes per week already. And I still have a week off of work to get organized! P.S. I have a guest room – come visit me! Oh and I have a cutie pie I’m taking care of now…….not the roommate I was expecting, but he’s a treasure for sure.

Mommy and me after loading the moving truck

Taking home my buddy Rocko!

                I know I’m forgetting a lot. But I think we both can agree that this blog post is long enough haha. Peace and blessings. Paz y bendiciones. Siglos y siglos. Amen.

Oh and I visited MK in Wildcat Country!

And I visited Tori at Thomas More!

Love Without Language

Last week, the young adult group was a breath of fresh air. One super athletic girl pushed me to run even more and harder than usual and had great conversations and prayers with me. They were a super encouraging group in general. There were two married couples, and the rest were single 20-somethings. Both of the married couples have two years of marriage under their belts but had been dating for over ten years each, which I think is very rare and beautiful. It was super encouraging to see everyone’s love for each other and how they served each other and each other. They found joy in daily tasks in a very refreshing way and were super relational. Most of them didn’t know each other before the trip because their church in Austin is very large and has several campuses. I really enjoyed getting to know several of the gals. Jessica, the curly-haired African American girl of the group (who the Dominicans frequently thought was native to the island) had a hair product conversation with me, and ended up giving me her leave-in-conditioner as a little blessing to me at the end of the trip. It’s one of the best things I’ve ever smelled in my 23 years of life. 

New favorite hair product, special thanks to Jessica from the Austin Stone

She has a very unique and special way about her. She was one of the photographers of their group, and I could tell the first day I met her that she viewed the world and other people in a very neat and inspiring way, finding beauty in little things and focusing on connecting deeply. There were only a couple decent Spanish speakers from the group, but it was really cool to see the rest of them interact with the kids and Spanish-speaking staff here through the language barrier. On their last night here, I shared with their group something God had put on my heart, especially since some of them had expressed frustration and feeling like their interactions lacked value here without Spanish skills….The universal language is love. In 1 Cor. 13, the attributes listed to describe love, such as being patient and kind and rejoicing in what is right, do not require speech. Sometimes when speaking isn’t an option, love is often even more obvious. I encouraged them that love is what connects us as human beings and as they go back and readjust their lives to what they have learned from the trip that they continue to focus on loving as they have loved here, in their actions as well as their words. People notice.

VBS with Austin Stone Church

This week: we had the largest group yet, a high school group of 37 people! Kelly and I had to share our bathroom (one shower, one toilet, one sink) with five other girls. I knew going into the week, the bathroom could potentially be a challenge. I was right. (My razor got borrowed without permission and I had to throw it out. Kelly got half of her conditioner used. The place was a mess. There was almost always someone in the bathroom. One night, before anyone could shower, we had to fix the curtain rod which had somehow ended up on the floor. And it smelled worse than the polluted river in town that had a rotting pig in it. To say the least, our patience was tested.) It’s never boring here.

Sylvia's "Jesus is the vine, we are the branches" peacock-looking interpretation. It's never boring here

One of the first mornings, though, I went running with Jacob and Meagan (one of the high school girls), and she was a huge encouragement. She said she’s a cheerleader and shared her motto with me: no challenge, no change. I was super glad she shared that with me. Instead of viewing challenges as roadblocks or annoyances of life, I was reminded to view challenges as opportunities to embrace as a means to change. As we ran up the giant hill, I reflected on the bathroom situation and started to see it as a way to allow God to work in me and bring change to my heart and my way of living. If everyone was easy to love, I would never learn the joy of making an extra effort to love.

The group just left this morning. After being exceptionally loud past 2am the past couple nights, I was relieved by the solace of the peaceful house after the buses left. Before they got in the buses, Scott, one of the leaders, had all the guys do an extra cleaning of their room and asked them as a group, “How does a man serve?” They shouted back, “WITH REJOICING!” Wow, I love that. I’m stealing that idea….don’t just serve, but serve with REJOICING. Yes. That’s exactly what I needed to hear. Scott was one of the best leaders I have ever met in my life. Early on in the trip, it was the second day of leading VBS for the kids, and he led all of us in prayer before we started. He acknowledged that as we do our tasks and form habits, we can start thinking we can do things on our own power. He reminded us that nobody can save souls except God, and we need to have a constant attitude of prayer and reliance on God in all of our tasks. Amen!

Still loving encouraging the Makarios staff through Zumba! This was Imani's last day in the DR after 4 years of service. Next adventure for her: life in New Jersey!

I also recently got to share my testimony in Spanish with Lucia, our housekeeper. It was a really special bonding time of sharing, and it was very mutually encouraging. She shared with me that none of her family growing up were believers. Then, after she became a Christian, slowly her family all became believers as well. I can definitely see how she would have that effect on people – she lives what she believes! She definitely has the spirit in her. The host wife who lived here a few years ago before Margaret also worked with Lucia. Last week, Lucia had a really bad feeling about the previous host wife and had Imani (one of the staff) get in touch with her and find out what had happened. The week before, her daughter had been in the ICU and still has continuing health issues. I didn’t get all of the details, but it’s evident that the holy spirit is working through Lucia in a very unique way.

Last week, I found myself with some free time one day and decided to teach Sylvia, one of the neighborhood girls, how to make friendship bracelets. A couple other neighborhood kids joined in, and it was a really fun time and great way to connect with them. Those same kids later tried to steal money through a window of the house when we weren’t home, but we found out, and they got a “boche” (stern talking to) from Margaret and I don’t think they will ever do that again, at least in the near future. Theft isn’t as much of a problem here as it used to be, from my understanding. A few years ago, there was a dictator here who cut off the hands of anyone who stole anything. Though that rule would (hopefully) never fly in the US, it seemed to work well to deter thievery here. Dominicans are very honest people in general. For example, we were just at the beach yesterday with this last group, and one of the vendors on the beach found a pair of shoes that belonged to a group member and returned them to us. And I really wanted to buy a Dominican newspaper but didn’t have change for my $500 peso bill. The guy selling the papers said he would get change for me and walked away with my large bill (equivalent to $12 US). Cole (one of the interns) joked with me after a few minutes of the guy not returning that I just got ripped off. But the guy returned with my change soon after J

It’s hard to believe there’s only 3 more weeks before we return to the US! This week, we get some time off. Then, we have two more weeks of groups (including our first group of middle schoolers of the summer)!

Here’s some things you can look forward to hearing about:

-          Worship event tonight with Nicole (Dominican teacher who lives across the street) in Puerto Plata

-          Running and milking cows with my Peace Corps friend Michelle

-          Kelly and I cooking for Lucia and her family on Monday

-          Community Zumba night Tuesday

-          Snorkeling trip with the interns

-          Meeting Angelica (!!!) my Compassion child in Santo Domingo!!!

-          Two more groups filled with awesomeness and God-sightings!

In the meantime, please continue to be in prayer for us and the ministry of Makarios. The longer I’m down here, the more I want to call this place my home. And I keep thinking of ways my family and friends could serve down here too, so I think you all will end up moving with me – prepare yourselves J Please also pray for (unrelated to the DR) my living situation for when I start work in Indiana. I was so looking forward to living with my friend Sarah and having automatic Christian community and accountability with her as roommates. However, I recently found out that she will be getting married the week before I start work. Entonces (translation: “that said”), I need to be on the lookout for a new roommate ASAP, for financial and spiritual reasons.

Hasta luego, si Dios quiere, (Until next time, Lord-willing)

Juanita (my Spanish name)

A New Red, White, and Blue

If you are looking for something to pray for, please pray for a sweet 6-yr-old in Pancho Mateo. I’m blanking on her name right now, but she has a serious health condition and lives with her very unloving dad. Her left arm has swollen up to the size of a football player’s arm, and she is going to have it amputated in the near future. She used to be a student at Makarios, but for complicated reasons related to her uncle that I still don’t fully understand, she is no longer a student. She is full of grace and has a super sweet spirit, and she needs a lot of prayer.

I am continuing to love life here in the DR. Kelly and I have decided we will probably both move here in a few years, si Dios quiere (Lord willing). It’s interesting to spend the 4^th of July here in the DR. Although, the DR colors are red, white, and blue too. It’s just a different red, white, and blue that doesn’t seem to bat an eye at July 4^th….but I’ve heard their February 27^th is quite jamming here, as that is their independence day. We are going to have a little BBQ just for fun today for those of us that care about the 4^th of July. I’m bringing mangos.

I’m trying to think about what has happened since my post last week. We have a new group in now. They are a young adult group from Texas. Makarios has most of their PR in Texas, I’m realizing. When we introduce ourselves to new groups, I’m always the “non-Texas person.” I’m proud to represent the north, but I never really thought of Kentucky as the north before.

Shout out to the group last week who left all of us super encouraged by uplifting notes!!!

I like this group. This is their third day here, and they are already wearing me out. This really athletic girl is here, and she convinced me to run with her this morning after yesterday’s difficult run and my “hot Zumba” class. So I’m pretty beat now, but it’s good to be exhausted, especially when I have this morning off and can just sit and blog. The team is currently in Pancho Mateo, one of our main communities we serve. They are cleaning the church there and playing with the kiddos. Last week, we had a jamming volleyball game in Pancho Mateo for the girls. Most of the sports here are taken over by guys, so we wanted to allow a sports outlet for girls. 10 or so girls came out and played with the team we had last week. It was a good game, but I didn’t watch most of it, to be honest. I was busy babysitting the little ones on the sidelines, trying to break up fights, calm tears, and keep the toddlers from crawling into the broken glass haven under the concrete bleachers. There are so many kids here who are responsible for taking care of their younger siblings. There was a 5-yr-old toting around her naked baby brother. And one of the 12-ish-yr-old girls playing volleyball kept coming over to the sidelines to calm her 2-yr-old sister. On the up-side, they are learning parenting skills very early on…but they are also experiencing a very different childhood from the North American norm. I have yet to figure out what’s good, what’s bad, and what’s just different?

I had a really good conversation with my mentor Tuesday, while I treated her to a Coca-Cola with an ocean view. She talked some about what she learned during missionary training before her move to the DR. She said some things are good, some things are bad, but some things that we view positively or negatively are really just different from our cultural norm and we view them in a tainted way based on that. That got me thinking about things on bigger and smaller scales. I think growing up, I had viewed some of my sisters’ qualities negatively just because they were different from mine. But in reality, differences can be huge blessings. People can reach others for the kingdom of God because of their differences. The same is true for culture. Yes, they drive like hooligans here. But at least that keeps them from texting and driving because they feel more of a desperate need to pay attention to the road. There’s good and bad in the differences.

This is my beautiful mentor Gabrielle with one of her students in the Chichigua community.

We also talked about how, as a missionary, we aren’t just bringing “The Gospel.” In reality, we are bringing ourselves. So focusing on being filled with as much of Jesus as possible is vital to missionary life (and the Christian life period). Even though people are getting “you” rather than Jesus, the more filled we are, the more the Truth can be spread through us. That was a huge encouragement to me to hear and just to be reminded of how essential preparation through growth in the Lord is.

We (the interns) also got to do a super cool thing the other day before the group got here. Margaret and Doug were taking a chill pill together at the beach, and we were in Los Ciruelos with Sharla (the founder of Makarios – and CU grad – who was here with her two boys she adopted from here). We were given a task to do random acts of kindness for all of the Dominican and Haitian Makarios staff. It was SUCH a cool experience!! We baked several batches of cookies and brownies to give out. (Many of the staff don’t have ovens, so it was a special treat for them.) We hired Aldo, who drives some of the students to and from school, to drive us around for several hours. The first stop was Los Algodones, where we met up with Monica and Odilsia. They cook lunches at the Makarios school. We gave them cookies and talked with them. They were so surprised and overwhelmed with joy at our visit. Monica shared with us about how she came to know the Lord through meeting her husband. She said she wanted a husband very badly, so she went up the mountain and prayed to God for a husband. When she met her husband, she knew it was an answer to prayer and that she could trust in the Lord. Before leaving, we prayed for them and exchanged reluctant goodbyes. Then we went to Chichigua, where Ronal lives. He works at the school and has the one of the cutest baby girls I have ever seen. He and his wife became believers a couple years ago and got married shortly after. Ronal, like many Haitians living in the DR, are in the process of trying to get their residency papers so that they won’t be deported and forced to live away from their families and established lives here. Then we visited about 10 houses in Montellano, bringing heartwarming tears to the eyes of a couple of them. Back to Los Circuelos, our final stop was for Lucia and Belizeur. “Beli” is a teacher at the school. He teaches religion, math, and English. He runs with Jacob and a I a few mornings each week and is the daughter of Lucia, our cleaning lady and cook at the Mak house. They have a beautiful, loving family, and Lucia’s husband is actually a pastor at a church in Los Algodones. After we prayed for them, Lucia’s husband prayed for us too and encouraged us to be in prayer for the United States, especially because of the recent Supreme Court ruling about gay marriage.

You see that wall in the background? The community of million-dollar homes on the other side put it up to block out the view of the poverty. (Otherwise Chichigua would still have their beautiful view of the ocean.) Isn't that what we do to God, telling him we don't want to see the areas of need in our own lives?

Thinking about some cultural differences once again, I reflected on how, in the United States, people would be more likely to be upset by a spontaneous visitor than to be overjoyed to the point of tears. Their hospitality, relational focus, warm greetings, and openness about struggles to pray for really touched me and challenged me to live more like that.

On Sunday, Kelly and I had the unique opportunity to go to church in Los Algodones with Lucia. It was the most treacherous moto ride of my life. This time, it was not because of the traffic but because of the terrain. Evidently, many moto chofers refuse to take people to Los Algodones because the roads are just THAT bad. Beli and his uncle (Monica’s husband) drove us. Sylvia came with us too and did my hair for me before we left for church. She is a sweet blessing and honestly feels like a little sister to me. I didn’t understand very much of the service because it was mainly in Creole, but the pastor (not Lucia’s husband, but a substitute pastor) was surprisingly fluent in English and translated for himself so we could understand. There were a couple little girls who were super intrigued by us the whole time, holding our hands and touching our hair. When it was time for the offering, I gave them some pesos to put in the plate, and it made their day! Like my sister Laurel always says, it’s the little things.

Kelly and I had some free time before the group got here Wednesday, so we snagged a few hours with Cleuyi at the beach. Cleuyi is our moto driver who is very open to the Gospel but hasn’t committed yet. I wrote my testimony and a gospel summary in Spanish and shared it with Cleuyi. He said it was beautiful, and we had a really good discussion. And we all enjoyed our Mango Verde Gatorade, not available in the US to our knowledge.

Yep, there's 4 of us on Cleuyi's moto. Livin' the dream, going to Montellano to get peppers and tomatoes.

I went over to Nicole’s yesterday. Nicole is a sweetheart. She’s a counselor for the kids at the Mak school and is studying psychology at the university. Her English is better than my Spanish, so we went on a walk and had a lovely Spanglish conversation. I met her friend and neighbor Danielle. We went to the colmado so I could get change and buy a bag of hamburger Cheetos to share. Turns out they don’t like hamburger Cheetos though, but at least I tried to share them. Nicole and I had a really good conversation about determining God’s will and about this book called Love Does that I just read (p.s. I highly recommend that book)!

I had the privilege of cooking dinner with Lucia and Odilsia yesterday. And by cooking dinner, I mean slaving in the 90 degree kitchen for 4 hours, loving every minute of it, as I made great conversation and jokes in the best Spanish I know how, according to Jonnah standards. I’m learning that “good food” here is classified as food with a LOT of salt and oil. It’s scary (for my health) how much I like it. I always tease Lucia that it needs to be spicier (mas picante es siempre mejor).

In other news, I’m hoping to meet my Compassion child Angelica in a couple weeks! I told Cleuyi I have a girl in Santiago, and he got a little freaked out, thinking I have a daughter. I debated not clarifying, just for the humor of it, but then I did.

P.S. Mom I get tons of compliments on your pants, though I typically roll them up into shorts because despite the thin material, it’s just so Dominican hot here. I love it though. I’m used to the constant sweating and enjoy it as long as I stay hydrated.  

A guy just passed the house on a horse with a pig following behind.

Peace, love, and happy 4^th of July!

“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters.” Col. 3:23

Grace and Fellowship Abound

Howdy yall! I’m in my third week here in the DR. It’s been crazy sometimes, good sometimes, and crazy good sometimes. Last week, we hosted Grace Bible from Dallas, TX. This week, we are hosting Fellowship Round Rock (from Round Rock, TX – just outside of Austin). My mind is all over the place. I’m leaving in less than an hour to meet up with the crew, but I have some free time right now, so I thought I would update this blog. So here goes…

God gave me Gabrielle as my mentor during my time with her. I have gotten to meet with her three times now (officially, but I see her around several times per week). She’s a teacher at Makarios for the Pre-K3 group (for the 3-yr old cuties). She’s been a huge encouragement and we connect very deeply. We have shared our testimonies and talked about life down here, family, ways to pray for each other. She challenged me most recently to write out a brief testimony and gospel presentation in Spanish to practice and have on-hand so that I can always be prepared to share. I’m excited to prep that!

We (the interns) got to have our first moto trips to the school. (Although, now that I’m writing this, I’m a pro.) My first moto experience was a bit scary, especially with all of the bumps in the road, but I loosened up halfway there and enjoyed the adventure….with my hands clasped tightly to the seat.

I have gotten to meet a lot of the staff at the school. They encourage me so much because they are so passionate about what they do! Most of them are Dominican. They sang the Makarios school song for us, which (now that I’ve heard it a couple times) always makes me get up and dance. It’s a lot of fun!

We also started our Bible study of James with Margaret and Doug and the other interns, which is proving to be a huge blessing as well as a very unifying and edifying experience for all of us.

We got to spend a day at the beach, which was a good break. Kelly got her entire head braided into cornrows. It was really cool. She kept them in for a couple weeks and just took them out the other day. While at the ocean, I got something in my eye and my eye hurt for several days, but it doesn’t anymore. Also, speaking of beach time, I’ve been getting a lot of sun. If my tanning rate continues progressing at the same rate, I will be darker than the Dominicans by the end of the summer. I also realized that pineapple is a great addition to chicken salad ß free advice for you. And I started reading Blue Like Jazz while at the beach, which I have now completed. It made me think a lot, especially about my ability to make a difference with my individual life and how I need to fight against my self-centeredness.

The Grace Bible group was a blast overall. They were a genuine, great group in general with plenty of spunk and humor. It was my pleasure to lead them in different activities, VBS, community visits, and construction projects. And I was blessed to learn from them, be challenged, and have deep conversations. And we got to have a water day with the little kids in which we filled up two swimming pools in the back yard and got a slip-n-slide out. They didn’t understand the concept of a slip-n-slide at first, but it was humorous and fun.

I got a freaky spider bite that kept growing and bubbling up with fluid, but now it’s basically gone and just have some skin discoloration.

A few of the other interns and I took a moto trip to a cheap restaurant called Balin in the next town over, Montellano. Balin is the name of the guy whose restaurant it is. He runs it with his wife and two sons. His sons are learning English and are surprisingly good. I enjoy the hot dogs and tacos there ($1 each)….they are unlike anything American haha but they are great with the Balin hot sauce. On our way, we had to find motos to take us. Kelly and I found this guy named Cleui (it took me forever to figure out how to say it right), and he has proven to be the best moto chofer around. I actually got to have some good conversations with him recently on trips to the school and church. I found out that he is 23, not a Christian, but he attends a church here and likes the people but hasn’t committed yet. I’m excited to see what God does with him during our time here. He’s a super sweet guy, and I’m hoping he can come hang out with us interns sometime. He wouldn’t join us at Balin our last time there because he “needed to go home and shave first.” They take going out really seriously here….even just to go to the grocery store, people shower and dress up. I try to have just enough swagger to not draw too much attention to myself….it’s a hard balance, as an American girl here usually draws attention regardless.

I have gotten to meet a lot more people in the neighborhood recently, which is always fun and encouraging. They are so welcoming and open. I love it here. I think I might live here forever ßthis is fair warning. The other day, Kelly and I were walking some kids home from playing at the house. It was about a five minute walk, but it ended up taking us a beautiful hour because we talked with the kids’ grandparents for a while and played around more with the kids, then stopped and talked / prayed with Sylvia and Miguelina’s aunt on our walk back. Sylvia and Miguelina are very special to Margaret and Doug. They take care of them a lot because they are orphans and the aunt is not very capable.

I also met this gal named Michelle who is also living in Los Ciruelos, but with the peace corps. She’s really cool and doesn’t get out much. She’s hoping to come to church with us this week.

At church, I met this lady named Theresa. She’s super sweet and gave me a cough drop….they basically eat them like candy here, but I actually needed a cough drop that day.

Lucia, the cleaning lady, has a son named Abrahm who comes here to the Mak house to clean too, and he has a great singing voice. So Lucia got him to sing Happy Birthday to my dad last week. That made my day. He’s sweeping and singing in the room with me as I type this.

We got to check out a new beach for a couple hours this past weekend – Sosua. The water was clear and beautiful. We (the interns) went out snorkeling and saw a bunch of fish.

Yesterday, there was a girl here from Fellowship who wasn’t feeling well. She thought she was going to throw up and was struggling with anxiety, so she stayed back from the construction work. I was able to pray with her and bring her water. I was surprised to see her later in the day, and she thanked me for praying for her and said she felt much better after that. Praise God!

I got to lead my first Zumba class for the Makarios ladies this past Friday, which was a blast. All of the Tamarindo community kids watched through the fence haha. It was one of my favorite Zumba classes to date, despite being 90 degrees. There’s so much energy here! After the hour of Zumba, Kelly and I hiked up Mt. Isabelle for 3.5 hrs. And we didn’t get sore!

OK that’s all for now because I have to go work but there’s more to come soon! And pictures! Love you all and thanks for the support and prayers.

The hills are alive....with the sound of roosters.

6/10/15

The journey begins……on my first flight, a guy elbowed me in his sleep on the plane to Austin. But that wasn’t as bad as having my personal space invaded on my second flight. I was sitting in between two men who insisted on touching me the whole time, even after my several attempts to move away.

It was a great time getting to know the other interns this past weekend on the retreat. I got to watch the sunset at Mt. Bonnell in Austin with Iesha and Brian. It was so beautiful. I was glad Jacob (one of the other interns) had suggested it. However, I got 13 mosquito bites from that excursion. Also, I’ve found that my bug spray makes me smell like a walking citronella candle, but Kelly (another intern) likes the smell, so I’m glad it’s not off-putting to everyone.

I was kind of nervous about meeting the other interns….facebook stalking only gives so much information. When the interns arrived at the Highland house rental property (generously donated by Brian’s dad for the weekend), the awkward introductions ensued. But now, I feel like I have seven new friends. Chad, another one of the interns, is actually from Cedarville too, which was unexpectedly cool. He and Emily and Anna are staying in Austin for the summer at the Makarios headquarters, and Kelly, Jacob, Cole, Win, and I are NOW in the DOMINICAN REPUBLIC.

During the Austin orientation, we went on a scavenger hunt ending at Whole Foods for our burrito dinner. Then we had more of a formal introduction and received our job descriptions as we picnicked in the grass. I will be a group host, focusing on building fellowship, preparing meals, and supplying for the needs of groups who come one week at a time. I will also help some with the soccer camp, look into the feasibility of alternate energy sources for the school, and lead Zumba for the Makarios staff ladies on Fridays. Jacob is also a group host, and he seems to be an encouraging person to be around, so I’m looking forward to working together.

We had a game night and played Jenga, bananagrams, and catchphrase to have fun and get to know the Austin staff and Makarios summer interns. It was exhausting but funny. We had a rule that whenever you got out in the game, you had to say something interesting about yourself. I talked about scuba diving with Grandma last year.

During the Austin retreat, Kelly stayed the weekend with me at Iesha and Brian’s.

*As I was writing this, I was flying over the Everglades.*

We went to church at Austin Stone, which is a large network of churches in Austin. We went to the St. John’s branch. They serve Dominican Joe coffee, which is Dominican Republic coffee that supports the Makarios ministry. Then we had orientation in the Makarios office, which was in the same building as the church service. Kelly said the building (a community center) was built over an empty lot filled with drug needles…a great image of restoration.

Sharla, a Cedarville graduate and the founder of Makarios, told us about the history of Makarios and how it all began eleven years ago.

Jamie, another Makarios staff member, gave a lot of encouragement to us to serve God in our daily tasks and thoughts. It reminded me of Camp Loucon and our talks there about how everything we do should be worship.

Austin is known for food trucks, so we got lunch from a taco truck near the church.

We also got to go putt putting, take a trip to Dominican Joe’s coffee shop, eat P. Terry’s burgers and fries, and have a prayer time before the end of the retreat.

While we were at Dominican Joe’s, we got our prayer partner assignments. Mine is Emily, one of the interns working in Austin for the summer. She is more of the charismatic/prophetic type, of the mentality that I am often cautious of for theological reasons, mostly because of my opinions about speaking in tongues. But I kid you not, when this girl was talking to me, praying for me, and speaking over me, it broke me in a beautiful way and was exactly what I needed to hear. I had asked for prayer about my emotions and blamed my hormones. She challenged me on it and made me realize that the enemy had been attacking me with feelings of inadequacy, negativity, and fear. She redirected my thoughts to truth and reminded me that I am just a vessel for God and that He loves me and cares and won’t put me in a circumstance and expect something out of me that I’m incapable of. I’m super excited to stay in touch with her this summer and share our experiences and prayers. Also, I made an interesting connection with her because she and Anna go to church with my friend Jaret who I co-oped with!

After the Austin retreat, Kelly and I got to bed around 10:30pm and woke up at 3:15am for our early flight. It was cool how, although we all bought our plane tickets individually, we ended up on the same flights down!

*As I write this, I’m in the Miami airport and it’s almost 11am. Despite my Tex-Mex breakfast tacos at 5am, I’m hungry once again….I’m so EXCITED, especially to meet Margaret and the Makarios kids!*

IN THE DR…

We arrived June 8 with a welcome at the airport by a Mariachi-type band playing before the customs area. Once we got our bags, we were greeted by Margaret, Doug, Lorie, and her sons.

Now that we are FINALLY here, we have been going through another orientation down here with the Becks (Doug/”Paco” and Margaret). We have visited a couple different communities so far. The kids always want a “caballito,” which is a horsey-back ride. We typically oblige. It has been interesting learning about the history of the communities, success stories of individual kids who have grown into hard-working, Christ-centered adults from their experience with Makarios. There are a lot of places in the communities that smell like urine and garbage. There is trash service available here, but it’s usually more than they can afford, so the trash just ends up on the side of the paths.

We have gotten to try out some different food places down here. At one of the places, there was sushi for the equivalent of $3 in US money. I asked Margaret if she trusted the sushi there, and she gave me the go-ahead, so I got a spicy tuna roll for dinner the other night. I had a headache, and the sushi was a bad idea. I got nauseated pretty badly. After dinner, we took a trip to La Sirena (“the mermaid”), which is like their Walmart. I wasn’t feeling well, so Margaret and Kelly and I just got a few items and came back to the Mak house early. It was perfect timing when we got back because I needed to run upstairs and barf. Goodbye sushi.

We have met several of the Makarios staff now and several community members as well. One of the staff members we met is Benjamin. He’s a Dominican who used to be sponsored by Compassion International and later worked with Compassion. He said he could definitely pull some strings for me to be able to see my Compassion child Angelica earlier, so that’s promising. The email Compassion sent me told me it takes eight weeks of notification beforehand.

The animal life is flourishing here. There are cows in the yard next door. I plan to frolic with them in the very near future. There are also a lot of chickens and roosters. The roosters make their presence known. Today that occurred at 5am.

I’m excited to take the public transportation for the first time Friday on the moto. They are basically guys riding motorcycles who charge you to ride on the back and take you places. They also have carritos (Toyota Corolla cabs) and guaguas (vans) to ride in.

I’ve seen God a lot here so far. I’ve especially seen him in Kelly, my roommate. She’s so self-sacrificial and joyful. I have also seen God in how Margaret and Kelly were so helpful to me when I wasn’t feeling well (the night of the sushi upchucking). I also saw God recently in Margaret when she got so emotional about her friend Miranda going back to the states after serving here for a couple years. The bond they have is definitely from the Lord. Margaret also showed Christ to me in how she held a neighborhood girl accountable to make good choices during her free time this summer. I’ve seen God a lot in the kids here as well. In both of the communities we have visited, kids always run up to us, give us flowers, hold our hands, and ask us for “caballito” rides. One of the girls couldn’t find a bloomed flower to give me so she picked a bud for me and pealed back the green bud to reveal pink petals. She also found some beads and an “estrella” (a broken piece of plastic that kind of looked like a star). It made my heart melt.

We’ve also had some hardships here, but nothing unbearable. For several hours, we didn’t have water at the house from the faucets. So I wasn’t able to shower when I would have wanted to, but at least we still had drinking water from the botellones (giant water jugs). I have gotten over 50 mosquito bites, but now that I’m taking a B vitamin supplement, I think that’s helping. The heat makes me not feel as motivated to work hard, but I’m glad it’s so warm and beautiful here. I’m trying to focus more on loving others and being more self-sacrificial and gracious, which is easier than otherwise with such a great mission family here with me. The wifi is super flakey, so that has been kind of annoying, especially with trying to get information about my dad’s surgery recently. But I’m glad to be disconnected from electronics as much as I am.

This just in…. Kelly (Kenny) and I (Juanita) went on a walk to a store (un colmado). We got a little lost on the way there and ended up outside a house of about 10 rambunctious kids. Most of them were loudly playing dominos, and the rest were watching and hoping to jump in on the next game. We interacted with them a little bit then we were disrupted by a scary dog fight. I think the kids were laughing at us because we got scared when that happened. Then I asked a girl where the colmado was, and she told us to follow her on her bike. She took us a couple blocks away to the colmado, which was super nice of her. Her name is Adriana. (I’m trying to remember names and hopefully interact with the same people throughout my time here.) Kelly and I got gatorades at the colmado. They were green, which was unusual to us - mango verde flavor! It was delicious. Then we walked back to the house, saying “hola” and “como esta” to many along the way. When we got to our street, we met a woman named An (not a typo) who was out on her porch. We talked with her for a good five to ten minutes. Kelly is a bit better at Spanish than I am, but I can surprisingly hold my own in a conversation. We talked with her about her kids. Her son Estephen comes to the Makarios house to play sometimes. And she also has a very cute shy 3 yr old daughter and an infant. She invited us in to see her baby, who was napping at the time, and my heart leapt for joy within me. When we went back out to the porch, I asked if there was anything we could pray for her about, and she said there wasn’t anything. She said she goes to a catholic church and believes in God but isn’t really into religion. I’m hoping to really form a relationship with her while I’m down here, and hopefully God will use me in her life in some capacity. She was playing music from inside the house, and I recognized Enrique Iglesias’ song “Bailando” when it came on because it is one of my Zumba songs. I asked her if she knew Zumba. She said she went to Zumba with her mom before and would like to practice it more. I showed her a couple steps to that song. She said if I ever led Zumba in Los Ciruelos (the name of our community), she would come. When I came back and told Margaret about our talk, she said I definitely should host a Zumba day at the Mak house for women in the community towards the end of my time there once I had formed relationships with a lot of the women in Los Ciruelos(!)

Dinner is on its way…….quinoa and chicken and beans for me, cheesy enchiladas for the other interns. Yum!

Side note to my dad…there are no poisonous snakes or spiders here J

Don't Mess With Texas

And so it begins…

On Tuesday, I was just a mere human. Now, I am a mere human in Austin, Texas! I have embarked on this grand adventure. After flying on the extremely looong (hehe, 30 minute) flight from Dayton to Chicago, being unintentionally elbowed by the sleeping man beside me, I arrived in Chicago. It was a really neat, artistic airport. I wish I could have spent more time exploring it, but I had to focus on the task at hand: travelling to Austin, TX for our orientation retreat at the Makarios headquarters. Makarios is the organization I am interning with for these next two months. It is a missions-based internship in the Dominican Republic, working with a school for impoverished students in an area of sugar cane plantations and 100 degree heat. A lot of the students’ parents came over from Haiti to work on the plantations, which affords them their humble, shack-dwelling lifestyle. It’s an understatement to say that I’m excited for this journey ahead! I don’t know exactly what my tasks will look like yet on a daily basis, but I’m looking forward to helping in the name of Christ in any capacity I can.

At the Dayton airport, about to embark on this journey

Chicago airport groovy walkway

So….Here I am! I made it! I arrived in Austin on Wednesday night (June 3) around 10pm and was warmly welcomed by Iesha, one of the Makarios employees I interviewed with, and her husband Brian. They picked me up in their large, black, very Texan pickup truck and took be to their adorable apartment in the heart of downtown Austin, near the state capitol and the University of Texas. They invited me in, showed me to the guest room, and made tea for me in the kitchen. I sipped the tea as we chatted about life stories. I enjoyed hearing their love story and about their ministry here in Austin. A lot of what they talked about reminded me of the book The One (by Ryan and Amanda Leak – I highly recommend it); both of their family mission statements are “Live generously.”….and before last month, I didn’t even know that families made mission statements.

I'm in Austin and have a bed!

Since I got here a couple days before the intern retreat starts, I have some free time to explore. Yesterday, I had the opportunity to meet up with my friend Zeeke, who is now a youth pastor at a church here in Austin. We walked around downtown, choosing a place to go to lunch. We eventually decided on Perla’s Seafood and Oyster Bar, which I highly recommend for anyone looking for a meal in Austin, TX. I got the shrimp po’ boy, which was delicious. Eating also got our parking validated, so that was a win-win. Then we went to the Hope Outdoor Gallery, which is an outdoor graffiti park. It was unlike anything I’ve ever seen before, and it was a breath of fresh air (contrary to the fumes normally associated with spray paint). We hiked to the top of the graffiti park and had a great view of the city.  There was also a guy there selling a homeless newspaper called The Challenger. Since I am familiar with similar programs in Cincinnati and Ann Arbor, I decided to support the guy and give him a couple bucks for the paper. However, now that I’ve read the publication, I think they would need to change a lot of things before I would support the paper again. The bad grammar I can get over, but it was also filled with foul language and stories celebrating drug use. You live and you learn I suppose.

Food at Perla's

Hope Outdoor Gallery

Once the retreat starts Saturday, I will be all-consumed by this trip (in a great way). On Monday, I will be in the Dominican Republic!!!! FYI, if you would like to keep in touch with me these next two months, I won’t have phone service, but I will have wifi. Aside from email / facebook, I highly recommend getting the Voxer app J ….Skype doesn’t work so well with the wifi there. 

Keep the prayers coming! And let me know of any prayer requests I can be praying for for you as well.

Kissing Kitsch Goodbye.

            Before this class, I didn’t know what “kitsch” was and had never actually heard the term before. However, once I was awakened to the idea of kitsch, I couldn’t get it out of my mind. Thoughts of kitsch helped me to search for more meaning in my daily activities and relationships. Thank you, Belliveau, for opening my eyes to this idea.

            So, what is kitsch? According to the article, “Kitsch and the Modern Predicament,” by Roger Scruton, "Kitsch is pretense. […] Kitsch art is pretending to express something, and you, in accepting it, are pretending to feel" (3). The idea of kitsch applies to art, literature, and life in general. It’s the idea that pictures, being as mass-produced and effortless as they are today, carry with them much less meaning than the original paintings which took so long to make. Essentially, kitsch sucks away meaning and authenticity to leave behind only a make-believe, cheap substitute.

            I was crying at one point this semester after we had spoken about kitsch in class, I started thinking about why I cry – and why people in general cry. I came to the conclusion that sometimes words seem so befuddled by kitsch, and have thus lost meaning, to the extent that the only way to authentically describe our feelings is through tears. As a deep thinker, I often feel deeply as well; and, our English language, as vast as it is, doesn’t often do justice to what I’m really feeling. I find myself more likely to cry when I’m overcome with emotion and don’t know how to articulate it. I feel that if I attempt to use words, people won’t understand how deeply I have been impacted, regardless of my intonation or facial expressions.

Taking this idea a step further, I feel like our tears can lose meaning because of kitsch as well. It’s the same concept as the boy who cried wolf. If I cry often enough, people do not think my tears have any meaning. They might even feel manipulated by my tears, like I am intentionally trying to get them to sympathize with me by looking like a weepy buffoon. But the thought of that just makes me want to cry more, to be honest.

The idea of kitsch also applies to the news. It explains why people are so numbed to the pain of others in the world. Hearing about tragedies and suffering on the news has become commonplace – so overly “kitschified” – that drastic events no longer elicit a response. However, by recognizing that kitsch is the reason this has occurred makes me contemplate how life should be and how the pain of others should cause me to grieve and pray on their behalf. In that aspect, though kitsch can be depressing, I find hope in striving towards how life is supposed to be.

I also had the delightful joy of contemplating kitsch this semester with a male friend who I have starting a beautiful friendship with. He had this class last year and remembers the concept of kitsch well, so we had some great discussions about it. From talking to him, I realized that literally everything is tainted with kitsch because of our culture. We also discussed our fears that other people think of us as kitsch. I told him I didn’t think he was kitsch at all, and he said the same to me, but the words of one don’t rightly speak for the masses. Thinking about kitsch in the context of a dating relationship takes on a whole new meaning for me. There’s so much in our culture about relationships. We all know several other people in dating relationships to compare to, and, even more than that, romantic relationships are all over the media. It’s so difficult to know what to do and how to do it because of kitsch. How can we be authentic instead of being “just another Facebook relationship”?

Even in regards to communication in dating, kitsch can be a pitfall. My friend is currently dating a delightful young fellow, but sometimes she complains to me about how she wishes some things would change in their relationship. One of those things has to do with kitsch. You see, he will send her pictures sometimes, which makes her feel special, like she gets to be a part of his life wherever he happens to be. However, oftentimes, after he sends the picture to her, she finds it on his Facebook. There’s nothing wrong with what he’s doing, but his communication with her loses meaning once the picture is mass-produced for all to see online. I reminded her that intimacy fuels romance, so it makes sense that when he squelches the intimacy of that communication, she doesn’t feel as important. And it’s all because of kitsch.

            I’ve also been thinking about church services in regards to kitsch. It’s easy for me to assume that church is tainted by kitsch, so I don’t need to try to feel or think while I’m there. However, then I remind myself that’s exactly what the enemy wants me to think. What God wants me to do is to counteract any ounce of kitsch to find the meaning that He wants me to find from the service, apply it to my life, and make an impact for the Kingdom!

            I’ve also been thinking about Easter in relation to kitsch, since Easter was only a couple weeks ago. It is easier to accept the kitsch version of Easter that is often sold to us. With the kitsch version, we can know what happened but we don't have to internally feel the weight of the cost, the depth of the love poured out for us, or the beckoning of our hearts to respond. It's easier to focus on the Easter bunny - even on the risen Savior and eternity - than to truly recall, just for a moment, the sacrificial and intimately relational love of the Perfect Lamb. But when we do, when we transcend beyond the kitsch and allow God to direct our hearts to the authenticity of Good Friday, then Easter Sunday is more than beautiful - it's mind-blowing and life-changing. It means that my life has meaning, that I am special and loved, that my hope is rightly placed in the Lord, that I will indeed be with Him soon - in the presence of the best love. It means I can boldly and humbly serve in the confidence of God's promises. He won't stop at any cost for me. He won't withhold a blessing. His love covers me. 

            I’m about to embark on the journey of post-college life. I am starting to get emotional, thinking about not seeing my Cedarville friends, being afraid of living out my faith in the journey ahead, and daunted by the huge transition right in front of me. I realize that a lot of other people won’t understand my feelings. Even if they have gone through it before, they are detached from it now. Plus, so many people are posting about graduation on Facebook. The kitsch aspects of our culture just focus on what’s good about graduation: celebrating and moving on with life. However, I need to strive for authenticity even when I know that others expect the kitsch remarks that are easier to give. I need to resist the fear of expressing myself. People are craving to authentically feel, and joining in life together can lead to that. However, it takes trust, perseverance, humility, and vulnerability. Even if I deeply feel something, if I’m too afraid of what others may think of me or too prideful to be seen as emotional, whatever I say is going to come off as kitsch.

            To conclude, I want to talk about an interesting social phenomenon I became aware of a couple years ago. My friend was a student at Western Kentucky University, and she and her friends would hang out at the Christian Student Fellowship house. Every so often, someone would evoke “real talk.” For instance, someone would say something like, “Hey Mary Kate, real talk. How are things with you and God?” By saying “real talk,” they were acknowledging kitsch tendencies and saying that wasn’t what they wanted. Let’s seek real talk. Let’s seek authenticity.